It has been some time since I've written a new entry of joy. As always, there have been plenty of joyful moments and a desire to write, but there have also been many demanding tasks and not enough hours of sleep.
As many of you know, I returned home a few days ago from a lovely visit with Lizzy and her three little ones at their home in Florida. I treasured feeling surrounded with love every minute of my visit. There was always a darling face and a set of soft cheeks to kiss easily within my reach. When I snuggle the soft, warm heads, I feel my soul fill up with a wonderful glow that fills in all my empty spaces. I loved every minute of romping in the surf of a beautiful white sand beach with Anny and Merrylee, twirling and playing "Ring around the rosy" until I was too dizzy to stand. I loved playing games, reading dozens of story books, making Easter crafts, and spoiling the girls on a shopping trip. I sparkled as I cuddled Baby Benjamin and delighted in his big smiles and baby talk.
I loved it all, but there was an even deeper layer of fulfillment. I watched in proud and profound completion, the magnificent character of my daughter. She has grown to make my dreams for her come to their full potential. I am so proud of her strength. It is not easy to care for three little ones all day every day while her husband is away on military deployment. Her job never has a break. Through all of that exhaustion and loneliness, I see her standing like a rock. Her faith is strong and is an example to all who know her. I heard some of her friends talking about how their family lives are better because they have followed Lizzy's example of faith and devotion to raising her family immersed in the daily routines of prayer and scripture study. Her children are sweet and confident and secure. They are growing and thriving in their spiritual and academic development. They are happy and well adjusted.
It all requires great effort, but I see Liz doing all of the things I have wished for her, and I see the blessings in her life and the lives of her children. Watching her family life feels like a bountiful harvest for me. The fruits of my labors in her childhood are coming to their maturity in a very pure and beautiful way. It is another layer to my joy that I don't think I could ever have anticipated. I'm confident that my life's work will not end with me. What is dear and precious to me lives on through my daughters and sons and their daughters and sons, and so on forever. It makes all of those midnight feedings and taunts from fellow grad students as I tried to haul my pregnant self into a desk seem very indifferent now. My early days of motherhood were rich with blessings two or three decades ago, but they are exponentially sweeter now.
